Friday, March 2, 2007

Reflections-Pablo Neruda

Reading Pablo's words is like a reawakening; the deep love and dark feelings that he emits..."I like for you to be still: it is as though you were absent....." speak to the dark corners of one's soul, that which is felt but never said from fear of appearing insane.
The truths he reveals effortlessly making it seem like a poem of love and devotion when in fact he speaks the truth of he intentions..."I was alone like a tunnel. The birds fled from me, and night swamped me with its crushing invasion. To survive myself I forged you like a weapon, like an arrow in my bow, a stone in my sling. But hour of vengeance falls, and I love you." To be loved with such honesty.... I love you because I was all alone and you're the only one I was able to thanks, but still beautiful in its presentation (this would definitely prove the point that a gift truly is all about the packaging).

Thursday, March 1, 2007

Focus, Focus, Focus....

I'm sitting here at the end of my work day and I am taken by the fact that I didn't do much but think about and research my next endeavor, I wasn't able to focus on anything else...Sad isn't it, to be someplace where you know you won't be for long....It has a bitter sweet taste to it. The eminent pressure of not wasting anytime so that I am not here much longer is contrasted by my need to fulfill my obligations and help those that are sitting right in front of me while remincing of all I have learned from them.

Am I being selfish in wanting to break free from what is expected of me?

How does one best serve society? Do we "do what we have to do" all the time or is there such a thing as "time for me"? The line is blurred and one must take certain risks when acting on that which one feels is "their part in the grand play".

So as I move forward in search of "what is me" I only know one thing for certain.......Love is all you is all you need (come on you know the words) Love is all you need...... Seriously, letting yourself love is the greatest of all things but first you have to figure out where to start? That much I have accomplished; loving my children and finding the one person who loves me with all my faults and who I am learning to let go and love more and more everyday.

Now I'll focus on starting something new.

I need to focus.